Sarah and her sister decided to surprise their parents with a trip to Niagara Falls for their 30th wedding anniversary, so I finally found myself in Canada! Now for those of you who are unfamiliar, let me provide you a refresher. Canada is basically just a territory of the United States that we don't really want because it's cold and full of Canadians. Canada is also known for it's unusually high violent crimes rate, which can be attributed to the fact that over 2/3 of their population are polar bears. I believe it also serves as an entry point into Narnia, but what do I know, I'm not a scientist.
But anyways.... Sarah and I flew into nearby Buffalo and took a cab across the boarder, whilst Sarah's parents drove from Connecticut, and Candice and Eric drove over from Maine. Luckily no one ran into any issues getting there, although Candice was traveling with some four-day old, unrefrigerated pasta which I'm pretty sure is not something that should be consumed by a human body. Or even a raccoon's body. I'm pretty sure a metal car basking in the sunlight does not offer the same level of food preservation as a refrigerator. I don't understand why people don't listen to me, I'm basically a scientist.
We mostly just relaxed and hung out on the first night, but the next day we took a trip to Niagara on the Lake, which was a really nice town about thirty minutes past Niagara Falls. To get there, we only followed one road that ran parallel to the river, so there were plenty of cool things to see along the way. One such place was Fort George, which is a rebuilt replica of a fort that saw some action during the war of 1812.
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| For those of you who watched The Office - The Maiden of the Mist, where Jim and Pam got married! |
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They took all the trees and put them in a tree museum, but for a dollar and half you can pay to see them. Don't it always seem to go, that you don't know what you got til it's gone. They paved paradise and put up a parking lot
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For those unfamiliar with the war of 1812, it's basically just another story about Canada fighting to become a part of the U.S. and the U.S. fighting ferociously to prevent that from happening. The best part about visiting the fort - entry was free! Apparently Canada values free access to educational opportunities for everyone... America values money. Fort George also has a recurring musket firing demonstration, which is super entertaining. I love it when you meet people that are genuinely passionate about their jobs, it makes all the difference.
We had a picnic for lunch in Niagara on the Lake before heading back. Along the way, we passed about eight thousand wineries and finally stopped at a place that sold local honey. This is either a fun fact or an urban myth, but apparently getting local honey helps minimize your allergies. The idea being that the bees have collected pollen allergens and processed them in the honey, so the honey strengthens your immune system. So if you suffer terrible allergies - go get some local raw honey!
That night we also had a fancy dinner in the revolving restaurant located at the top of Skylon Tower, was modeled after the space needle in Seattle, courtesy of Sarah's parents. The views from the tower at night were wicked, because you get to see the falls from above when they are lit up in different colors. We also decided to do a little gambling that evening. Candice somehow won thirty dollars for getting five non-matching items on a slot machine. I somehow lost when I got three of the money symbols on a different slot machine, but won when i got a vampire, werewolf, and a mermaid. I really don't know how those machines work. Luckily Eric and I hit up the craps table later and I was able to recoup most of my losses. And Sarah pulled through by winning a few dollars playing black jack so we ended up breaking even!
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| We decided to torture Sarah's mom with a speedboat trip along the rapids that form at the bottom of the falls! |
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| The Niagara river, which serves as a dividing line between New York and Canada, features hydro-electric power plants for both countries. This is a photo of one of the Sir Adam Beck Generating Stations on the Canada side. |
The next day we decided to go back to Niagara on the Lake to do a speedboat tour along the rapids. I'm not entirely sure Sarah's mom wanted to get on a boat that would be doing 360 spins and tearing through level 5 rapids, but I think she had a good time! After the tour was finished, we did another picnic lunch and then did a mini hike along the river gorge. I do have to say I was pretty impressed with how active everyone is over in Canada. People were bicycling, hiking, climbing, and just enjoying nature in general.
For our last night, we decided to hang out and grab dinner at a Mexican restaurant. Americans having a Mexican dinner in Canada. Talk about celebrating the diversity of North America! After supper, we went bowling and dominated some arcade games. We pooled all of our tickets to get the premium prizes. You all know what I'm talking about. Premium prizes that included a plastic army dude, foam dice, and a Chinese finger trap. The latter of which Eric tried to trade for a parachute man, but was refused since his fingers were already stuck in said trap... Apparently once a finger trap has been used, it loses all intrinsic value. All of these items probably have a combined retail value of thirty cents, but cost us about $20 in arcade tickets.
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| A little view of the Niagara River |
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| A view from above the falls on the American side of the river |
The next day we all had to separate and make our way to our next destination. Eric and Candice started their journey back to Maine, Sarah's parents continued their road trip further into Canada, and the missus and I had to fly home. Fly home and work on our house. When will it ever end?!??!?!
In my last blog, I mentioned my favourite room in the house, the termite room. I'm now going to offer you some advice. If at any point in your life you are in a relationship and want it to end, drywall a room together. I've done a lot of projects over the years; Installed laminate flooring, tiled kitchens and bathrooms, wired outlets, painted houses, assembled shitty ikea furniture... None of them compare to drywalling. It is brutal.
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| A man's feeling ambitious. He decides to take down some wood panelling. |
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| A man finds termite damage. He blames his girlfriend for wanting an insect infected house that was above their agreed upon price range. He grabs a beer. |
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| After a few more beers, he thinks to himself...I can fix this. I'll tackle it tomorrow. |
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| Three weeks later, he pays a contractor to fix it |
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| But he installs the insulation himself, because he's a cheap bastard |
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| He then tricks friend into helping him hang the new sheet rock with the promise of beer and pizza. He also spake of a cake. But there was no cake, the cake was a lie. |
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| Man succeeds. He spends hundreds of hours and dollars to fix room. He also spends an additional thirty seconds and $8 to have a friend bring Nando's sauce from the UK as a surprise for girlfriend. Girlfriend comes home from work trip and sees room. "Oooooh, it looks so good!". Said girlfriend then walks into kitchen and sees the sauce. "OH MY GOD, NANDO'S SAUCE!!! THIS IS THE GREATEST DAY OF MY LIFE!". Man still doesn't know why he bothers. |
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| Ahhh, but doesn't it look nice!!! |
Luckily we were able to complete the room ahead of July 4th weekend, because pretty much all of my siblings decided to come back to KC. Nothing like a little last minute spontaneous family reunion... See, booking travel on a whim runs in the family! We also had a quick weekend trip out to Massachusetts to mourn the passing of Sarah's godfather the following weekend, so we were both able to see quite a bit of our families in a short period of time. Sarah's dad met her godfather when they were walking around the outskirts of Boston as children, and decided to start throwing rocks at each other. 30 years ago kids could walk around at five years old and play outside without adult supervision. Today, a ten year old can't even walk to school on their own without someone sounding the alarms. This generation is going to be cotton candy instead of salt of the earth.
The missus and I spent the rest of our free time this summer road-tripping around the country, starting with a trip to Yellowstone and Grand Teton, but that's a story for another blog....
Random GoPros
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| Sometimes the best way to do lunch when traveling is to just grab some food from the grocery store and have a picnic. |
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| If you go to the falls, it's worth staying 'til the night when it's all lit up |
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| Talk about a view at dinner! The revolving restaurant in Skylon Tower |
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| The ever elusive horizontal rainbow |
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| The view along the Plymouth jetty |
Sarah and Sean's Sensational Stockpile of Snappy Snaps
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| I'm just a man with a stick and some balls... |
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| When looking at Joe' s face, I can only imagine he is trying to comprehend why his daughter is still with me. It's a look I see quite often from people, particularly when I speak. |
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| The Byers Clan |
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| Niagara Falls? More like Viagra Falls when you're looking into the eyes of that sexy beast. |
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| I'm free, but I'm focused. I'm green, but I'm wise. I'm hard, but I'm friendly baby. I'm sad, but I'm laughing. I'm brave, but I'm chicken shit. And what it all boils down to, is that no one's got it figured out quite yet. But I got one hand in my pocket, and the other is snapping GoPros. |
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| I'm broke, but I'm happy. I'm poor, but I'm kind. I'm high, but I'm grounded. I'm sane, but I'm overwhelmed. I'm lost, but I'm hopeful baby. Cus what it all comes down to, is that everything's gonna be fine, fine, fine. Cus I got one hand in my pocket and the other indulges in selfies. |
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| What a bunch of Lowe-lifes.... |
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| When I look at this photo do I see the Lowe Bros? Do I see a happy family? Do I see incredible hair? No, I just see a poster of Stallone punching Dolph Lundgren in the face. Displayed as a symbol, nay as pillar of hope for all men, that they too may display their possessions in their homes. No longer shall we be oppressed by women and forced to hide our movie memorabilia in the basement. We must be strong, we must be united. The Manimist movement is real!
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| Baby Ray took one look at that Rocky poster and knew what he had to do... I can only imagine what would have happened had he seen the ninja swords. |
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| Sarah was forced to have her first Yeti! A Lowe family tradition |
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| Soaking up the sights where the pilgrims first landed! |
