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| It's not always the special attraction or famous spots that are worth seeing. Sometimes something as simple as a sunrise can be the most impressive thing you'll see on any given day. |
We arrived in Byron at 630 in the morning and I had no idea where my hostel was since I don’t plan ahead, however I got a little lucky as the bus drove past it on the way to the station and it was only about a half mile walk..good way to wake yourself up in the morning. Nothing was open since it was so early, but I ventured to the hostel, hoping it had 24 hour reception, but alas it did not. Since it didn't open until 9, I double backed to a spot I’d passed, Mac’s Milkbar & Cafe (Can anyone see the word, “Milkbar”, and not think A Clockwork Orange?). I was starving since I skipped out on dinner the night before; My malnourishment approaching 20 hours. I got an egg and ham sandwich served on ciabatta with a coffee for $9. It was incredible, plus they had fast wifi. Since I needed to be there another hour at least, I also ended up getting a pineapple and coconut smoothie, it was insatiable.
Upon being able to check into the hostel, I immediately headed for a shower. The showers were pretty random, sometimes you would get scorching hot water, followed by cold water and other times you got a perfect shower. It was also the first hostel that required a deposit to get kitchen dishes/utensils, but they provided free pancake breakfasts to make up for the hassle. Upon eating my lunch I ended up meeting a few girls from Brasil who told me I could stay with them if I go to World Cup next year. That’s what I’m talking about! They also invited me out to a bar called Cheeky Monkeys to grab dinner and watch people dance on the tables. To make things even better a smoke machine started running, stranding everyone in the midst of a mist of misbehavior. (I'm a little alliterate)
I also finally got to go on some of the activities I had prepurchased in New Zealand. My first destination was a hippie/stoner town called Nimbin, which is infamous for it’s marijuana cookies. Apparently they separate the chemical that makes you high from the leaves and then turn it into butter, which then replaces the normal butter you would cook with. Marijuana is illegal in Australia, but the cops don’t do anything to stop the distribution of weed in this town for some reason. As the bus rolled up to the main street, everyone’s eyes were drawn to a kid that was running around/clucking like a chicken. This image was only enhanced as a real chicken ran out from an alleyway and he started chasing it down...while still running like a chicken. I was keen to have what he was taking.
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| I love that this little carving is falling apart |
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| This psychic told me that I am the reincarnation of Enrique Iglesias |
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| Everyone enjoys a good pun |
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| Fashionating Fact: Buddha meditated on rainbows |
Upon exiting the bus I was offered weed a dozen times in two blocks, but I was on the prowl for some of the legendary cookies. It was 3 for 20 or 6 for 30 with the instructions that you only need half a cookie if you don’t smoke or a full cookie if you smoke regularly. Let’s just say I Mary J. Abliged to buy a 3 pack, when I finally found some after eleven long seconds of searching... I’ve only smoked a handful of times in my life (Congrats parents, you raised me right), so I started with half a cookie, but to be fair a full cookie is needed to get high. Plus since you are eating it, you have no idea when it’s going to hit you, but eventually gravity surrenders as you get higher and higher and higher.
After chilling in town for a few hours, our bus took us out to a picnic area where we hiked through the woods to a dam while our driver barbecued some burgers and sausages. I have to say I didn’t expect Australia to be so green, but there are forests and trees everywhere. After lunch we stopped by a waterfall in the middle of the rain forest before heading back to Byron Bay.
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| Who knew Australia was so lush, I expected desert |
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| This sign reminded me of all the minions that used to work for me..bwahahahaha |
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| The driest, most pathetic waterfall ever |
I was glad to get back as I had a big adventure of kayaking with dolphins the next morning! I was pretty excited on two fronts as I had yet to kayak, let alone in the ocean, and hadn't seen any dolphins since I got unlucky on my New Zealand adventures. Of course I arrived in my I Am Awesome t-shirt to the delight of the crew, but opted to go shirtless so I could get a better tan and test out my shirtless dolphin attraction theory. Was I the only dude there not wearing a shirt...Absolutely I was.
I ended up getting paired up with a Canadian girl because she had never kayaked and you have to have someone that either knows what they’re doing or is in decent shape in the back of the kayak. One kayak out of thirty tipped as we made our way out into the ocean...and yes, it was ours. The Canadian girl tipped it and fell out, showing a lack of balance and coordination that rivaled my own, and nearly unraveled the months of work I have spent learning to love and accept Canadians. Wishing I had eaten another cookie, I got back in the kayak and paddled onward.
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| I love this photo, with the light tearing through my face like i have one eye and my armpit hair looking magnificent! This photo encompasses my desire for adventure |
Once we got out into the open water, we were lucky to spot a few dolphins jumping out of the water, but that was only the appetizer for what was to come. Now, I’m not going to say that me being shirtless lured all the ocean dwelling mammals to the surface, but the correlation is 100%. We spotted roughly seven whales, with some coming within 20-30 meters of the kayaks, the closest a whale has ever come to a kayak in the history of the Universe. The funnest part of the trip, however, was the journey back to the shore, as a giant wave came up behind us and sent us racing towards the beach.
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| Look at the crappy camera they used to take our photos...they need a gopro. Can you spot me? :p |
After a few more days of relaxation in Byron Bay I started to make my way up to a little place called Surfers Paradise. As I got onto the bus, I noticed the guy in front of me looked like he was having the shaky shakes of heroin withdrawal. The only time he wasn't curled up in a ball or puking in a plastic bag was when the bus stopped and he went outside to smoke. I took this as a sign from the universe that I should not do any more drugs on my trip... unless they’re really cheap or I’m drunk or it’s after 8 AM.
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| My hostel was across the street from this! |
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| Paradise indeed! |
I was expecting Surfers to be another small town like Byron, but it was more similar to a suburb in the states with a few skyscrapers and a million shopping centers. It also marked my reunion with Mikkel, who is going to school out there. We met up for some burgers with his friend Morten at Surfers Sand Bar before hitting up a bar called Melbas that had $2.50 Coronas, until they became $7.50 two drinks later. There was also a costume party going on there. Number of bellybuttons seen: 87. Number that didn’t belong to hairy dudes: 12. Odds of staying there: 0.
We also met up with some of his lady friends (good work Mikkel) at an Irish pub. At some point in the night we also all hopped into a taxi van that took us to a dance club, where I learned the Danes do all sorts of dirty dancing bullshit that I can’t do. But sober or drunk, I am excellent at making an ass of myself. Eventually I realized it was 3:15 AM, I was quite pissed, and I had no idea where we were. Ergo I said my goodbyes and went outside to find a bunch of people standing around. A couple guys told me Surfers Paradise was a few miles toward the visible skyscrapers...and that I should definitely take a cab. But here’s the deal, I can’t afford a $30 cab ride, so I drunkenly stumbled back to my hostel. I also didn't allow myself to purchase McDonalds along the way, because that would have been $5-$8, and I’m not made of money. Thus I arrived back at my hostel at 4:15. How exactly it took me an hour to walk 2.5 to 3 miles I will never know, but I arrived alive.
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| Mikkel photo bomb |
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| Someday my arm will be full of stamps |
During my remaining days in Paradise, I met up with Mikkel one last time, worked on my tan, pretended to utilize the outdoor workout stations along the beach, and did some clothes shopping. I found a Cotton On, which is basically like H&M. Thus I got a slew of $5 t-shirts, so I didn’t have to do laundry for another week. I have yet to do laundry in Australia and I only have 4 pairs of underwear...you do the math. In my defense they are a special kind of travel underwear that you can wash in the sink and I go commando a lot.
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| Iowhat up! |
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| I accidentally took this when going to turn off my time lapse...but it's a pretty cool photo, especially with my right arm being 99% more tan than the rest of my body. |
My next stop was Brisbane, which I was pretty excited about since it would be another big city to explore. It also houses one of the Irish girls from my Stray trip, Christina. But that my friends is a story for another blog.
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