You've Gotta Steal The Time From The Life That's Passing By...

Early on in my trip to South America I realized that something in me had stirred.  As the days passed and I stared out at colored lakes, snow-capped mountains, volcanoes, hot springs, run-down towns, stray dogs, ancient ruins, my bowl cut, and everything else that I would never have understood from reading books or looking at pictures, a light bulb went off in my head.  The functional part of my brain that always found the most logical answer to any situation started to make room for the dreamer that had been dormant for far too long.

I've always relied on my head to get me everywhere.  I was lucky to be born with a knack for learning things quickly.  I finished college when I was 20 with about as much difficulty as one has taking off a shirt (and yes I made that analogy so you'd imagine me shirtless, and then explained it further in this parenthesis section in case you had imagined yourself taking off your shirt instead of me, so now it's guaranteed you've imagined me taking off my shirt.  It's also highly likely that I've imagined you taking your shirt off as you read through this lengthy explanation).

Once I got a job, it was more of the same, except I was getting paid and had money to buy whatever I wanted.  But eventually I realized that having money and possessions, while nice, wasn't really that important to me.  At the end of the day was I really doing anything to help anyone other than myself?  I wasn't the kind, thoughtful kid I once was.  I was becoming the guy no one would ever want to be in a negotiation with, because he could rip apart all their arguments.  Hubris has always gotten the better of me and I knew if I stayed on this path of climbing the corporate ladder I would miss out on the humility (that I think everyone would agree) I so desperately need.  I don't want to be the guy that makes people feel stupid or small, I'd much rather be someone who makes them laugh, someone who looks and hopes for the best in them.

So I decided that I needed to make a change and put myself into a situation where I wouldn't have answers or a safety net to fall back on.  I needed a challenge, something that would blow my mind and let me embrace my inner idiot.  Thus, I made the decision to take off and see the world, but do it in a way where I can travel not as a vacation, but as a way of learning and hopefully get a taste of the different cultures I'll be visiting.  I plan on making my way through New Zealand, Australia, Southeast Asia, and eventually Europe with just a couple backpacks, cameras, my testicle eyepatch, and an edible thong (You have now imagined me shirtless and in a thong, you truly are despicable).  Most of the time I will probably just be backpacking, but I also plan on doing volunteer work where possible.  Partially to do some good and partially to meet different people.  Everyone has been asking me what my plan is, but I just smile because I don't actually have one.  I want it to be an organic experience, I don't want to stress myself into moving to the next location because I have it planned on an agenda.

Besides if I fail, I can always return to my previous career, the one where I was a male model:

I was the going to be the next Fabio, but that was....before the accident

And yes it is depressing to know I peaked in the spring of '95 at the ripe age of 7.  I got into Coke; I was consuming 12, maybe 24 ounces a day.  Sometimes I'd even do these stix of pixie dust, I was always getting fucked up on pixie stix and Coke.  My life fell apart... but back to the present.  So for the first time I can recall, I'm deciding to stop following the logical side of my brain.  I'm making the illogical decision; The one to take off, with no plan on when or how to get back.  But at the same time, I'm starting to believe it's also the smartest decision I've ever made.  I finally realized what so many people  have always known, but I've always missed;  That sometimes you don't need to follow your head, you need to follow your heart...


My next post should be in Kiwi country, likely in July or August.  Eyepatch up!